GD
Geodynamics

Poetry

The Sassy Scientist – Science Sweethearts II

The Sassy Scientist – Science Sweethearts II

Every week, The Sassy Scientist answers a question on geodynamics, related topics, academic life, the universe or anything in between with a healthy dose of sarcasm. Do you have a question for The Sassy Scientist? Submit your question here.

Apollo and Artemis ask:


What is your opinion on workplace romances?


Following up on last week’s post, I’ll answer Apollo this time ‘round.

Dear Apollo,

There once was a guy called Apollo
Who worked on some spheres that were hollow
He felt very lonely;
Just thinking “If only”
“I meet someone in the years that will follow”

When you love your plates and the world’s oceans,
And determine their absolute motions
You may end up sad
Wearing mostly plaid
And you’ll end up missing some promotions

If you think that the core’s isotropic
She might seek a new research topic
You’ll have lots of fun
With the very near Sun
Other stars may prove too hypnotic

In love you may call me a novice
But I wouldn’t if you share an office
Things may turn sour
And you’ll have to cower
Well, at least you’ve tasted what love is.

Be careful if she’s still your student
I don’t think that this would be prudent
Such position of power
Means you’ll pay by the hour:
Your career will not have a good end.

Yours truly,

The Sassy Scientist

PS:

I hope you enjoyed every limerick
and now know how to woo a chick
Just give her a rose
Next post will be prose
all this talk about love makes me sick

The Sassy Scientist – Science Sweethearts I

The Sassy Scientist – Science Sweethearts I

Every week, The Sassy Scientist answers a question on geodynamics, related topics, academic life, the universe or anything in between with a healthy dose of sarcasm. Do you have a question for The Sassy Scientist? Submit your question here.

Apollo and Artemis ask:


What is your opinion on workplace romances?


This week’s question just gives me lots of inspiration. This question (in slightly different formulation) was sent to me twice, separately, by a guy and girl, so I’ll answer in two separate posts. To keep their private thoughts private I named them Artemis and Apollo, the Greek twin gods. I turned to my good friend the limerick to respond. Ladies first. Enjoy.

Dear Artemis,

There once was a girl called Artemis
Her choice of men was fairly remiss
Alone in the shower
Exempt of brainpower
She was pining for someone to kiss

When you’re into the fault interface
And foreseeing a lovely embrace
Just cease now with waiting
Stop differential equating
Go out and charm him with grace

With a focus on mantle convection
That he beholds with strong abjection
Switch subject soon
Go study the Moon
And he will partake with affection

When you’re still sat on the fence
You might feel it very intense
“I like working with him”
Don’t collapse on a whim
Love oftentimes doesn’t make sense

Don’t fall for your cute supervisor
Even though he’s your thought analyser
In several years
You’ll both be in tears
Now go out and find someone nicer

Yours truly,

The Sassy Scientist

PS:
This post was written in style
Thinking of this took a while
Much to my liking
The rhyming is striking
I’ve got more on one massive pile

PS2: Can you think of a better limerick?