Navigating the challenge of making new friends in a new place -well, thanks to academia…- can be as complex as decoding the Earth’s geological history. This time Bob is demanding our knowledge for:
New academic job. New town. New life. It was fairly easy to make friends when I was young but how do I make friends as an adult?
Dear Bob,
Bob. Bob. Oh, Bob… Thanks for interrupting my vacation prep for this. Do I look like a social butterfly to you from there? Do you really think that I can be your grand master Yoda? Well, I can be a social butterfly; I prefer not to, especially not to be your own personal friendship expert. But I will make an exception for you, so here is my wisdom:
Step 1: Friendship requires sacrifice. Stop being a snob scientist, leave your beloved laptop behind and go outside, even though it means that the moment you do that something will go wrong with your experiment.
Step 2: Join some clubs or groups for whatever you enjoy and makes you happy like you just watched a Studio Ghibli movie. If you don’t get this reference, then what are you doing with your life? Open Netflix, watch Spirited Away or Howl’s Moving Castle or … Okay, moving on.
Step 3: Fake it till you make it. I don’t know, do what people do: act like you have a social life.
Step 4: Pray to the friendship gods and hope for the best.
Yours truly,
The Sassy Scientist
P.S.: I won’t be surprised to return from holidays and see that my inbox is full of thank you messages when you make a friend group and become its star, but maybe keep them to another time.
