Well, well, well, what do we have in here? Is that another fellow geoscientist going after a fund? Yes, seems like it. First of all good luck mate, a tough journey is ahead of you. I hope you have a lucky item with you to keep you alive during this period. So this time we have Boris asking:
How do I secure funding?
Dear Boris,
Now, let’s get real. Securing funding for your research is like finding a rare gem in a field of pebbles. It’s tough, it’s competitive, and it requires the finesse of a master negotiator. But fear not, for I am here to guide you through this treacherous terrain.
First things first. You need to define your research project! And no, I don’t mean scribbling a few half-baked ideas on the back of a napkin. You’ve got to bring your A-game, we can’t afford to lose the game. Seriously, you are not a CEO of a company, you are an underpaid researcher who needs this funding! Develop a clear plan with objectives, timelines, and expected outcomes that would make their jaw drop. If you are having a problem organizing it, do what I do: ask Marie Kondo!
The second item on the list is of course – drum rolls please – moneeey. Identifying those funding sources can be difficult, boring and time-consuming. You need to carefully go through the vast database of funding websites and unearth those valuable nuggets of financial support that could fuel your scientific ambitions. Such a captivating use of our precious time, isn’t it?
Did you find the perfect funding for you? Okay, buckle up because we came to the bumpiest part of the road. You guessed it right, GUIDELINES. Ah, the guidelines—those pesky little details that can make or break your funding dreams. You know I recently got a rejection from one because of a little detail that I didn’t pay much attention to. Eligibility criteria, deadlines, evaluation methods and so on and so forth. Absorb them like a piece of bread absorbing hot water, make them a part of your soul.
You might think you almost arrived at your destination, but sorry mate, we have just started. It’s time to unleash your inner beast -the wordsmith- and craft that research proposal. The spotlight is yours, shine bright like a quasar. Paint a vivid picture of your research problem, objectives, and methods. Show them why your research is important, in what sense it is original, and how you contribute to your field and beyond. Do you know what helps? Having something more interdisciplinary. Talk about some possible collaborations, and make the dream team, make The Avengers jealous. They will be like “A research team that’s hotter than a lava flow? Yes, please!”. I can already hear them opening up their wallets. Oh, and don’t forget to support your ideas with some solid evidence and references.
So much fun, right? I mean, who doesn’t love the adrenaline rush of trying to condense years of research into a handful of persuasive paragraphs while keeping your sanity intact?
We are almost there. It’s submission time. Take a deep breath, follow the instructions and press that submit button. Make sure that you have copies of every single thing you presented in your application. You know how bureaucracy works, something will be asked again for sure. Did you do it? Good. Now you can start biting your nails and wait for the moment of truth. I’m joking, please don’t bite your nails: not healthy. Remember, my fellow scientists, this is a competitive and lengthy process. Don’t let that stress eat you up; it is not like Survivor, they are not going to kick you out of the island -I mean science, who said island?- if you don’t get it.
That’s it for today’s sassy advice. Now go out there, and win the lottery. It’s easier, trust me.
Yours truly,
The Sassy Scientist
P.S.: I will ask for partial credit or full credit (depending on the grant) when you get that funding.
